When I saw the post above from my newsfeed, I reflected upon the friendships I’ve had over the years and decided that it is time for a new me. I am the kind of person who loves to keep in touch with my friends. Now I know everyone is in different stages of their life and it is not an excuse for you to return calls, text messages, or emails. I understand we all have a busy life, but I don’t appreciate the effort that I put into it. I do not tolerate that kind of friendship. I’ve always believed that friendship is a two-way street. I am pretty sure that some people feel the same way I do or maybe not? Sure we have Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and all the other social media platforms available to us, but whatever happened to make time for each other? Have a girls night? Lunch/dinner to catch up old times? I mean I’m not asking to speak to you every day, but just time out of your busy life to keep me posted on how you are doing. I mean think about it? Can you imagine your friends who call you and let you know they appreciate it? It is either they take you for granted or thank you. Which one is important to you? When do you call it quits? When do you suck it up and be cold-hearted?
I had a friend back then in college, I’ve known her since 2001, and we’ve been through crap with our boyfriends, college life and family as well. It was good! I would randomly call her house and say hi to her mother make small talk when she wasn’t home. So let’s see, we are friends on Facebook and Instagram. A couple of years down the line, I left voicemails, and of course, I was patient with her because I know that she was a good friend to me. So for about three years, she has been in and out of my life returning my calls. So last year, she finally called. She told me that she appreciates our friendship and that I call to encourage her with what to do with her life. She opened up to me again because she was in her vulnerable stage of her life and did not know how to tell me. She was depressed and down because everyone is moving forward with their lives except for her. She apologized, I understood, and she made me shed a tear because she finally realized that I make a good friend and never forgot about her. So last year, I left her a message and greeted her Merry Christmas & advance Happy New Year to her and her family. HA! Guess what? Nothing!
So this year, the friendships that I’ve had in the past? The effort that I put into keeping in touch? I’m done. I learned that ok if I am not a priority in their life? It is their loss. I wonder when people appreciate you? When you pass away, and they regret why they didn’t? HA! Seriously people! I am not perfect either, but still, make time for the people I cherish and called them “family” or “sisters.” Life is short, and sometimes you don’t want to regret it. I think sometimes it is because some people don’t like confrontation or being honest with you. I mean it is simple! If you do not want to be friends? Or admit that you are a horrible friend and suck at keeping in touch? Just let me know, and I’ll understand.
Sometimes, down the line you kind of question of what kind of person you are? You reflect on yourself and just think what happened? We change along the way, and it is up to us to make that leap of faith of making that change and accepting it. 2018! I chose by eliminating the friends that I kept in touch with and realized that they do not appreciate my friendship. In the end, I learned to know my worth and moved forward.
Do you think about your friendships and the effort you put into it? Is it worth it to you?